Hen Party - Fun or Just Complete Shit?

I am not a person to whom marriage means a great deal. In fact there is only one thing worse I could think of than having to walk up an aisle in a church infront of a couple of hundred people in a stupid looking white dress looking like I have 10 layers too much of make up on and pretending to be enjoying the moment while I am trying to think of "don't blush - the photos will look shit" and after having practiced a perfect smile in the mirror for months before only to look like a rabbit caught in the head lights - this thing is the hen party.

I had the opportunity recently to take part in a hen night of someone I know and I discovered that the only thing to do to keep sane on such a night as we were made suck our wine from willy straws like our lifes depended upon it and adorn ourselves with L Plates and willy clad hats is to simply get pissed.

Sitting in the restaurant getting locked while drinking a mixture of wine, water, and zambouca from willy straws and planting L Plates on our tits while the bride to be had to strip to put on a t-shirt with 10 dares on the front of it. Who the fcuk wants some random guys underpants as a momento of the last night of "freedom"???? Who gives a shit that you have to get as many guys numbers as you possibly can before the night is over - what is she going to do with these - use them for backup when times get tough or boring in the marriage?

• I would consider making a point of informing everyone that I am having my last night of freedom to be a complete waste of the last night of freedom. I think is I was ever in this situation, I would get dressed up in the sexiest outfit I could lay my hands on, probably have my hair and make up professionaly done for the night and go out and flirt with as many guys as is possible in one night getting them all to buy me drinks so that I would be getting married happy wit the knowledge that it is not the end of my life and that if things go bad I can use this as a reminder of what exactly I am capable of - beats the shit out of willy straws and L Plates doesn't it?

Anyhow, having all of these thoughts about hen parties I wanted to find out the origin of the hen party itself. And I found it quite difficult to do. Basically all I could find is that the hen can spend one last debauched night before she becomes a married woman!! Great isn't it?